Yesterday I read an article that my lovely sister in law had posted on facebook. It was called One Thing Your Daughter Doesn't Need You To Say. It looked interesting so I decided to read it even though it was kind of long...reading isn't really my thing.
It was a Christian article, obviously directed at parents of teen girls getting ready to make the transition to college or I guess any other big change.
The article said that parents don't need to tell their daughters to set an example for their friends whether their friends are Christian or not. Telling someone to be an example in this way, takes away from who they are as a person. Christians are not expected to be perfect, say they perfect thing, or have their lives all together. We have a sin nature just like everyone else and need Jesus just as much as everyone else. So telling someone that they need to be the example is kind of like telling them they need to be perfect. When in all reality, that isn't possible. I think we should try to follow Jesus' example and seek him daily but trying to be perfect will only make Christians look even more hypocritical.
I am really glad I took the time to read this article because even though it is directed at parents, I took some good advice out of it. Sometimes it feels like no matter how hard I try I am never good enough for my parents. I can get straight A's, work 2 part time jobs, clean the house, and they can still find something to get mad at me for. But all I know is I just have to do the best I can and if I know I am doing that, then maybe their expectations of me being a perfect little princess will go away.
This is the article:
http://www.chattingatthesky.com/2013/05/13/one-thing-your-daughter-doesnt-need-you-to-say/
This is also a song that I really like by one of my favorite Christian artists. It reminds me that I don't have to be perfect and God will still love me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKSQjSdU8VA
I read the article thinking it would be good to tell our youth girls about. I know some of them, if they mess up one time around their friends, feel like their whole testimony is screwed up, because adults have told them that forever. But the true is I think we're much more respected when we own up to our mistakes, take that responsibility, and figure out where to go from there.
ReplyDeleteAnd just so you know, even when you're out from under your parents, the same scenarios are going to happen with your future husband and children. There have been times that I've felt like I've slaved away all day and felt like I didn't meet Stephen's expectations for a clean house, or didn't meet the kids' expectations for play time... and I know there are times I've probably made Stephen feel like he couldn't meet my expectations and made the kids feel like they couldn't either. But our little family works on that constantly. Sometimes it's hard to see into another person's world. All we see is what WE are going through, how hard WE are working, the sacrifices WE are making. We have to make a conscious effort to try to envision the other person's life. When I think about Stephen working 12-14 hour days, especially when he works a lot of overtime to provide for our family, it makes me cut him slack in other areas. When he sees that I'm overwhelmed because I don't know how to handle a situation with the kids, he cuts me some slack in other areas.
I don't even know if that has a THING to do with what I started talking about... just got me to thinking. :)